A place where Dragonflies can come for motivation, inspiration, education, and be accepted as a Dragonfly!
The Dragonfly Forest
They have been given names such as devil’s darning needle, ear sewer, horse stinger, skeeter hawk, and the snake’s servant. Actually, Dragonflies are beneficial, peaceful, and stunning. You are a Dragonfly if you are: ADD/ADHD, dyslexic, dysgraphic, Asperger’s, NLVD, autistic…
Bill Cosby's son, Ennis, was dyslexic. Ennis struggled academically in school and eventually he was diagnosed with dyslexia after attending Morehouse College in 1988. Bill Cosby's television show, "The Cosby Show" was in it's 6th season. Bill decided to make his son on the TV show dyslexic. In 1989 the episode, "Theo's Gift" was aired (see below for this episode). Ennis worked hard in school and aspired to becoming a special education teacher. He was working on his doctorate in 1997 when he was murdered. Later that year Bill and his wife, Camille, founded the "Hello, Friend/Ennis William Cosby Foundation" to assist educating students with learning difficulties. Bill also made sure that a documentary on dyslexia and learning differences was made and "Ennis' Gift" was released in 2000. Below is this 51 minute documentary highlighting many famous people with dyslexia and learning differences: Ed Bradley, Ann Bancroft, Danny Glover, Bruce Jenner, James Earl Jones, and many many more!
For those of you who don't have time to watch the whole eposide (above) here's just a 2 min. clip (*I don't agree with the seeing backward comment but remember this was the late 1980's we have learned a lot since then):
Let us all continue to keep the spirit of Ennis Cosby alive by spreading the word that dyslexia is real, it exists, and it is a strength not a weakness. Every educator and administrator should should be required to watch this and ALL the other documentaries on Dyslexia. With understanding we can embrace dyslexia.
I understand how hard it is to have self-love and accept that we are beautiful. We live in a society that measures beauty by unrealistic standards. This is wrong! I can see the good and beauty in you, I can openly accept you for who you are; all your strengths & weaknesses! The key is for you to accept you too! Dragonflies have no idea they are beautiful! Check out this video!
Dragonflies are beautiful but not everyone can see that at first. It takes getting to know one to really appreciate how unique & special they are; gifts to the world. This video is a great one to teach us this lesson. So touching!
I have been successful in my life because I know what it feels like to fail so I am not afraid of failure. People who are afraid to fail are often not successful.
Don't judge my parenting skills based on my child's grades. Remember that there are some students who receive all A's but their parents are abusive.
This is a movie that every person should see, so if you and/or your children have not seen this movie then it is a MUST watch this summer. It is a great way to open discussions on empathy, values, beliefs, prejudice, and doing the right thing.
Danny: Good books to read that teach skills When we feel different or have a child that feels different it makes life challenging. It does not matter what disorder you have, life is challenging. The key is to accept yourself for who you are and learn skills to function in your daily life. Here's Danny from Asperger Experts explaining some great books that help build these skills. These are not only great for people who have Asperger's but also for any person as they are growing and learning in this world. Did you know that some kids with ADD and/or Dyslexia may have difficulties with social skills? Even children without any disorder may be socially awkward during their teen years so this video is good for ANYONE! Enjoy this video from our Dragonfly Friend, Danny:
So glad it is summer break so I can take a break from trying to keep the school updated and educated on how to educate my child. Yea, summer break, now I can really be myself and not worry so much about all the things I can't do but enjoy all the things I can do.
**Each Wednesday Quotes from parents and/or Dragonflies are shared. Quotes come from comment made on FB, private messages, emails, coaching/counseling sessions, and from normal chit-chat. Due to confidentiality and privacy concerns the person making the quote is not identified. Feel free to message me your quotes if you want (If you want your name attached to the quote I need your permission so state that you want identified otherwise you will not be credited).
I
frequently speak about the importance of moving away from shame and toward
empathy but often people do not understand this concept. For one, they do not understand what shame is
and how they contribute to causing shame.
Even the person with the best intentions maybe causing shame. Secondly, shaming can and should be stopped
in homes, schools, sports fields…
So
what is shame? According to Gershen
Kaufman, "Shame is the most
disturbing experience individuals ever have about themselves; no other emotion
feels more deeply disturbing because in the moment of shame the self feels
wounded from within.”
We
need to understand how events are perceived (remember one of my favorite
sayings: “A person’s perception IS their reality”). When
events occur a person develops an internal cognitive script about this event. Let me use an example from a recent posting I
did on graduations and ceremonies:Stop the Shaming. If a
students must sit for a period of time watching “academic high achieving” and “socially
popular” students honored with awards yet not receive any accolades themselves
they may have negative scripts running through their heads – “I’m not smart
enough; I stupid; No one likes me; I’ll never achieve; I try so hard but no one
sees so maybe I’ll just stop trying…” This
is shame. No one came out and said these things to these students but due to
their own experiences and frames of references these were the scripts they said
to themselves thus this was their reality.
Some
of you think we should put students who fit society standards on a pedestal so
those who do not fit these standards can look up to them and strive to be just
like them. I say this is the wrong
approach. It not only shames students
who do not fit these standards; it perpetuates the culture of shame. Here’s a quote from a recent post on Facebook
by “Dyslexics Rights” in response to a new article about graduation rates: “Dropout rates so high! How can high schools seriously celebrate on
graduation day when they have left so many behind? Really? How can you pretend
like you didn't know those kids who tried but didn't make it?”
As I have preached over and over we need to teach
EMPATHY! Not only do we need to teach
empathy to all children but also to adults.
We are a society that condones and encourages shame. There are still teachers and coaches that
believe that shame makes a child become more successful and motivated. Research has proven this to be wrong, yet it
is still an acceptable classroom management tool and our schools are set up to
reward some students while shaming others.
We need to teach self-acceptance and honor
self-expression over conformity. Did you
know that conformist societies have higher suicide rates? So have empathy for yourself on a daily basis.
We need to help students (and ourselves) embrace who
we are and accept all of our emotions.
Here is a great blog post that provides insight
into the writer’s experience with overcoming shame. Aspergers and Me Blog: “Shame does not make me
better. Rejecting shame does.”
Finally, remember my Dragonfly Friends you are great
just the way you are. When times get
tough and you have this negative script of shame know that I believe in you and
will accept you for who you are. Repeat
these phrase to yourself: “I am a valuable person who has great things to offer
the world,” “My mistakes do not define
me they only make me wiser and stronger,” and “I make this world a better place
because I am an important and unique individual.”
Don't ever let a learning disability stop you... EVER! Patricia Polacco did not learn how to read until she was 14 years old but that did not stop her from achieving her dreams. She is an author and illustrator. Patricia Palacco talks about learning disability Some of her books include: Thank You, Mr. Falker, Thunder Cake, Bully, Just in Time Abraham Lincoln, The Keeping Quilt, and many many more! Here is a great video of her talking to elementary students about wishes, friendships, and what it was like being a student with a learning disability. Very inspiring!!
